Comments on: On child-men, growing up, and finances

By: Jack

Jack — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 16:07:03 +0000

Getting married should not be a response to womens insecurity, and us man providing a ways for them to feel good. We are not to follow their expectations, why should we? They themsleves must also mature and learn that man are not suppliers, or that we are not here to make them feel good. A marriage should be a final product of a mature relationship, and not an imposed expectation of a group of insecure people, otherwise the percent of divorce couples will continue to grow steady!

By: jack

jack — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 16:01:45 +0000

It’s not the hobby (gaming, going out, etc…), it’s the person’s immature behavior that is at the heart of the matter.

By: Pete @ biblemoneymatters

Pete @ biblemoneymatters — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 19:14:59 +0000

I’ve had the argument with my wife about playing xbox360 on Saturdays – she says that any guy over 18 who plays video games is just a man-child (how appropriate for this post). I on the other hand happen to think its a nice stress reliever after a long hard day at work – kind of like her reality tv shows that i can’t stand to watch . Hey, it’s also a nice way to socialize with friends that I otherwise don’t see much.

On the other hand – i do think that way too many men (and women) shirk responsibility for too long because they just want to have a good time. I think you have to find a healthy balance between being a responsible adult, and allowing yourself to have some free time and stress-relieving activities.

By: Kelly

Kelly — Fri, 08 Feb 2008 13:47:58 +0000

My husband enjoys playing X-Box 360 and going drinking with his friends once in awhile and you know what? I tell him to have a good time. He works hard, helps me with housework, supports me emotionally and is a good man. I don’t consider a man immature if these are his hobbies, my husband is 37. If he wants to play video games on Saturday I let him have his time without making him feel guilty about it.

By: Matt

Matt — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 06:04:46 +0000

I wouldn’t worry about what she says too much. The vast majority of advice benefits the advisor, not the advisee, as is the case here.

Of course the author would want men to get married. Marriage in this society vastly benefits the woman. For all of women’s talk about “equality,” in many marriages I have seen it is the woman who is in control. And the men are miserable. Ironically enough, the happiest marriages I have seen are ones where the husband and wife both hold more traditional roles.

As a young man I have to ask, why would I give up single life where I do as I please for a woman who thinks I “should be folding the laundry.”

By: jana

jana — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 23:20:03 +0000

nicely put. i agree with you and others who said growing up should not be rushed any everyone should develop by their own pace. including us women. believe it or not, we also like doing things like going to bars and parties and playing games – and the sooner or later gravitate more towards being at home more and maybe cook a sophsticated meal or something (not all women are eager to marry and have ton of kids though – i believe that generalising men as “peter pan syndrome victims who just want to watch footbal and get drunk” is about the same mistake as considering all women ůcreatures who do not carry about anyhting but havimg children”:)

By: deepali

deepali — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 21:05:04 +0000

I’m all for video game night! Especially with all those fun Wii sporting games. You get exercise playing the games and watching other people play (from laughing so hard!).

By: mbhunter

mbhunter — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 18:29:00 +0000

Thanks for the comments everyone.

Deepali: A social video game night is a good thing. It’s cheap in money (if not time) and people generally have a good time.

Mrs. Micah: I was in school until I was 28. I went straight into grad school from college. I probably spend more time in there than I should have, but overall I came out ready to “face the world.” Now, a high school friend was married in college, and already has four kids. He went to law school married, and they had their first child while he was there. I think that would have been way too stressful for me.

By: Money Blue Book

Money Blue Book — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 03:53:10 +0000

Interesting…well I definitely know what the article is talking about – I guess I might be sort of like that myself, but I think it’s important to grow up at one’s own pace. Rushing into something like marriage or parenthood when one party is not ready isn’t right or helpful. We all experience peer pressure as children and I guess this is peer pressure once again for adults.

By: Mrs. Micah

Mrs. Micah — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 00:27:13 +0000

I don’t think people should be forced to grow up faster than suits them. It can lead to really unhappy adults instead. Do we need more depressed middle-aged men and women?

I talked to a guy on Wednesday who spent his early twenties traveling, went back to college, got a degree, then an MBA, then started his own business. He seems pretty responsible…and he just had a baby with Downs (whose ears I was testing). That’s going to be a big responsibility for the rest of his life. But now he’s grown up and better able to handle it. 5 years ago? Maybe not so much.